Well it’s 4:30 on the morning. Last night I just laid in bed instead of talking to anyone before bed and discovered P!nks greatest hits as something new to listen to. Found out that I really like her music so downloaded the album from Apple Music.
I asked my son last night to do chores. simple chores. One being to shut my computer down so it doesn’t over heat again and do the dishes and wipe down counters. I got up to heat my heating pad up and find none was done and to boot the security system was never armed before bed. My dog senses my tension and pisses on my floor. I bang on my sons door and yell at the top of my lungs what needs to be done. So now at 4:51am he is doing chores half ass. All I want to do is remain as trigger free so I stay out of the fucking hospital.
Yesterday’s call that my son’s killer is being released in 30 days is not helping me stay trigger free. So now I put an Amish movie on, made a toast, take a klonopin and going to try and relax. My one goal is to get outside today. I would love to return a shirt to a store today that I bought and sadly can’t figure out how it goes on (long story) so it’s going back. If not I plan on staying as busy as I can today work wise. Lord let this weekend be over quickly.— August 20, 2016