Limit the Toxic People in your life!

biohazard-98660__180TGIF! What a week it has been! This week I paid close attention to how people talk to me, normally I don’t always do that, I always took a “It is what it is” kind of attitude. This morning I call my Mom back because she had called when I was in the middle of a call at work. Her house recently got hit with lightning which blew up the stove, refrigerator and phone. I had an incredibly stressful morning. I start work very early, around 5:30 AM so it was nice to give her a call and just chat. She told me that everything is back in order in her house appliance and phone wise. I told her that was great. Then she just ended the conversation without asking me how my day is going so far, since she knows I have been suffering from some depression. I had a whole lot of positive and exciting updates I wanted to fill her in with, but I got the feeling she didn’t want to hear it. When did humans stop truly caring about others and how they are really doing? Instead most people tend to put themselves first. I am a Christian and I put Jesus first in all I do. I don’t expect everyone to have the beliefs that I do, but proper morals and respect for others I do expect.

The reason I was paying close attention to how people treat me when they talk to me, is because after talking to certain people I feel like crap and I guess I am so used to being treated like crap that I am immune to “hearing” it. My mom has a special talent of passive-aggressively putting me down or doubting that something good will happen for me. I love my Mom, but I am going to limit my interaction with toxic people. (The people who don’t edify you, they just beat you down and make you feel like crap.)

 

 

2 comments

  1. I think it’s important for anyone, especially those who suffer from anxiety or depression, to keep track of how they feel with everyone they interact with. In particular, those who we regularly talk or hang out with.

    In my case, I can think of several people who are toxic and who actively treat me like I’m “the complaints department.” Unfortunately, one of those people is my own mom. Ever since I was a very young girl, a little kid really, she would “dump” on me and “talk at” me about my dad, and it was tough being in such a toxic, almost one-sided relationship, where I had very little say due to my age. I was the youngest one of my siblings (by far, there’s ten years difference between me and the sibling before me, and we’re four kids in total), and by default, I was essentially left behind to take care of my mom. So, I totally understand what it’s like being in that tight squeeze of living in a toxic relationship with such a close member of the family.

    But, luckily, over time and with the wisdom of age, I was able to “cut the cord” so to speak, and I took several steps back from her. To this day, it’s still REALLY hard to interact with her because I find we end up stepping back into our old roles (ones which I detest), and I have to say, it often physically makes me ill and incredibly anxious even just dealing with her on a basic level.

    I refuse to regress and go back to such a high level of toxicity. I’m happy to say that I have drawn the line, and I refuse to cross back over it. It’s sad that I can’t have a “normal,” for lack of a better word, relationship with her, or other members of my family, but I think we’re just all each other’s triggers in the end.

    1. I can completely agree. I had to stop communicating with my Mom because she is a trigger for me. She can be very negative and not understanding. I found my anxiety was at my highest after talking on the phone with her even. So I completely agree, sometimes we need to limit toxic people from our lives, even if they are the ones closest to us!

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